Bad News

As we walked, the nurse showed us to a private room. I thought to myself, how nice of her, she probably thought the little walk had played me out already. Even though I had not expected Michael until the next day, since I was allowed my one covid19 regulated visitor for one hour once a week, but he had called ahead to let the hospital staff know that I was about to receive bad news.

My dad had passed away that morning. I wasn't ready for that news! When he said I have some bad news, I didn't know what to expect. I knew I had to brace myself for whatever it would be. I knew dad was getting weaker. He had not gotten the proper follow-up care since his heart bypass operation. He had one trip back to Sudbury, and they seemed to think everything was fine. There had been no further tests done, and he didn't want to go and do them either. He had resigned himself to living as is. The operation had prolonged his life, but didn't return him to state of youth and vigour. However, in the past two years he and my mom had been tag team duo. They did everything together. Being a farmer the work never stopped, they had sold the cows, replaced the burnt Ford tractor, and then worked on getting it rebuilt. Dad with the knowledge, and mom with the hands. They completed the haying and getting the winter's wood. Thankfully, my siblings took vacation time and helped them during this period. Winter came and went. They worked to prepare the garden. Another round of haying was upon them, but they just took it all in stride.

Then my news having cancer came, and they were worried about me. It's not easy for a parent to learn that their child, no matter the age, has cancer. Not much they could do, but I kept them informed of my tests, my results, and my progress toward the surgery. Tuesday, September 1st would be the last day I saw my dad alive. My parents came to see me because we were leaving the next day at 5am for Barrie. It was such a nice visit, and I was so happy that they had taken the time to come and see me. I had never been through surgery so there was a little fear because you never know. Dad wanted to give us money for the expenses, we refused to take it. He said that we had been there for him during his operation, and I said we were happy to do it. We hugged so tightly, and I told him that I loved him. I hugged my mom too. That will always be my last memory of dad, the feeling of love swelling up in both of us.

Michael pulled out his phone, and we called mom. She recounted the last events of dad's life. He had waved and told her bye-bye, then collapsed. Thank God for timing because she was there with him, getting help. Thank you to my uncle Raymond and aunt Janice for coming to help too. The paramedics and police for trying too. Dad passed peacefully at his home, in the entrance of house he built for his family.  This is the day our lives changed forever. Mom would have the most to deal with in the next few days, and many days to come. We kids would be there as much as we can be. She is a strong woman. She comes from hardy stock, and our ancestors have provided the DNA blueprint that we just carry on...

From my hospital bed I felt helpless, but my siblings were on their way to Kenabeek to be with mom. They would have to provide the funeral home with an obituary, and I was able to help in a small way like proofreading the document from on my phone at 2am. Mom asked the funeral home to hold having the viewing and funeral until I could be there. Now I had purpose to make sure to get out of bed, get walking, and get home to be with my family for the most important days of our lives. Nothing was stopping me from being released from the hopsital on Sunday, so that Michael and I could travel home on Monday.

Together as a family, we would have a beautiful funeral that my dad would be pleased with. The flowers we selected as a family, which was a beautiful arrangement with red roses for love, white roses for forever, and pink roses for the wild roses my dad always brought my mom.  Even with the covid19 restrictions, we were able to bring together family to say their final goodbye.  Being able to speak at my dad's funeral was hard to do, but the strength came from within to serve my dad and my family with honour and love.  It was my duty as the oldest, and dad had always said I had large shoulders.  I was proud to carry this responsibility for all of us.   Once the funeral home service was completed, dad would take the final ride to the Rosegrove Cemetery in Henwood Township, Kenabeek.  It must have been hard for mom to follow first in line driving behind the hearst.  I can't imagine what was going through her mind and heart.  More family gathered at the cemetery, and we stood together to pay our last respects to my dad.  It was a beautiful ceremony, and we were rewarded with the clouds parting into a large perfect heart, and the sun shone through warming us with eternal love.  Dad was sending his love from above.  It warmed our hearts with this everlasting memory.

A picture of my dad and mom that captures them how I like to remember them together...